Things Change

Well, things are settled down here for the most part. All of the drama that took place last night seems to be done with. I still have some negative feelings about things though. It seems as if I can't say anything right. Any opinion I have is the wrong one, any idea I have is no good, and apparently I am selfish and self serving and a lazy parent. I know the last parts to be untrue, but it still hurts that someone else could feel this way about me. Of course, those exact words were not said, but that was the meaning behind it. I feel so alone. I wish I had someone to confide in. I wish my sister and I lived closer together. I can be honest with her about my feelings and thoughts and they are okay with her. I feel like she respects my thoughts and feelings. I feel myself getting more and more depressed everyday. I am on antidepressants (yep, that's right. I'm not ashamed to admit it.) and maybe it's time to up the dose. I know Zoloft can't improve my situation, but it can improve my perception of it. I know if this gets read by certain people they are liable to be very upset with me. However, I feel like I have the right express myself. I'm not naming names or specifics, so I think this is entirely appropriate.

That's all I really have to say for now.